Richard J. Chandler

Composer for Performing Musicians

Want More Relationship Happiness? Balance the Power.

Take Two+ Tuesday
A Quote, a Thought + an Enriching Link

“Guilt implanted at a tender age is not easy to destroy. A weed, it sprouts in unexpected places.” – Caryl Rivers     

More Quotes by Caryl Rivers here

Thought: Want More Relationship Happiness? Balance the Power.

Is your primary relationship balanced as it relates to power? Does one of you typically have the last say? Has one person threatened to end the relationship on multiple occasions? 

Commonly, in unhappy romantic relationships, one person holds the cards on power. Balanced power in relationships is typically more equal initially; neither person has much time invested. Either one is more likely to end the relationship if it looks unpromising. 

But once a couple is together for a few years, one person can become more committed to the relationship than the other person. The less committed one can get the notion that they know best and begin to treat the other as an unequal partner. 

This unequal treatment can take the form of anger and aggression, threats, or withdrawal of affection. In romantic relationships, it is common for the person holding power to determine whether or not they will have sex. After an argument, it is up to the person of lesser power to apologize. 

But you may be able to balance out power in your relationship leading to both of you feeling happier. Balancing power is a primary issue to address, and it may take couples’ counseling to balance the power in a relationship. #6 of the “9 Ways To Improve Your Love Relationship” gives some tips for balancing power. The other strategies also help your relationship to strengthen.

+ Artistic Link:řina Pavlíková, the baritone saxophonist, is a wonderful musician that I have featured often in my LeadingMusicians Facebook group.